Yellow Jackets vs. The Whalers, May 29th, 2007 Neil Plays and Screws the Jackets "Just seeing Skorka in warmups threw me off my game," stated Matt Rovetto, the Jacket's goaltender. These sentiments were echoed by several key Jacket players. Captain Allan LaRobardier was quoted as saying, "Knowing he is on the ice just makes you play so hesitantly... You never know when he is going to try to roof it on our own goalie." This is just a few of the comments made by the Jackets players after suffering a 5-1 loss to the Whalers. Shortbenched again, the Jackets obviously senceless GM called up Neil Skorka. The Jackets coach explained the move by stating, "I believe his intent was to show the Jacket players what a really crappy player looked like so that they can feel better about their own horrid play of late." The move seemed almost accidental genious, as the Jackets were able to skate hard with the first place Whalers through the first period, holding a 0-0 tie. In the second, the Jackets were unable to overcome the weight of carrying Skorka on the roster, as they surrendered the first goal of the game. "Skorka was on the bench for that first goal, but I was dead tired and he was who was waiting for me to come of the ice... I couldn't let that happen," said Tanner Finnan. The Whalers struck again as Matt Rovetto took his eyes off the puck to give Skorka the Evil Eye as the Whalers took a 2 goal lead. Chris Sisco was able to shake the Skorka Polish Curse and tally a rebound faceoff goal to cut the Whalers lead to 1, but the Whalers struck back, as all 5 Whalers skaters took turns beating Skorka and then beat Rovetto to take a 3-1 lead into the third. As all the Jacket players were exhausted from carrying Skorka's dead weight all game, the Jackets looked tired and outskated in the third, as they gave up 2 more goals to take a final 5-1 beating. After the game, the Whalers looked obviously sorry for the Jackets, for having to play with Skorka, but unfortunately, they would not accept the trade of a used tissue and an empty pedialyte bottle for him because we were offering too much. Bastards.

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